in 1994, when i was 23, i decided to go ona week-long camping trip alone to get my thoughts together. i had just graduated from college here incalifornia and needed to make some decisions about my future. i decided to go camping in the los padresnational forrest as i had been there before as a kid and it was quite peaceful. i packed my things, drove to the park andbought the week primitive camping pass i needed. i told my parents where i was going and theyweren't too excited about me going alone, but as i am a well-built male, they only askedthat i pack a knife for protection.
i obliged. i parked my car and set forth down the trailthat i had chosen. my plan was to hike to a small pond that wasabout 12 miles down the trail and spend my week there fishing, relaxing and thinkingabout what i should do with the rest of my life. i hiked from morning to about 6 pm and tookmy time taking pictures, eating my lunch, and even writing in my journal. at about 6 pm i finally reached the pond andi unpacked my tent and equipment and got ready to sleep.
i was so tired that i passed out and didn'twake up until the morning. in the morning i made some coffee, made apb and j sandwich and threw my fishing line into the pond. over a couple of hours i caught a couple ofbluegill and was getting some much needed solitude. i gutted my fish and put them back in thewater so that they would stay cool for a couple of hours so that i could make them for lunch. after this i went back in my tent and decidedto take a nap. i fell asleep fast.
about 30 minutes into my nap i was awokenby a woman crying hysterically from what seemed to be a few hundred meters away. i instinctively got up quickly and openedmy tent and turned towards where i had heard the crying. what i saw scared me instantly. i saw a naked woman about 70 meters away inwhat i would guess was her forties walking in my direction. she had long brown hair that was tangled andher face was contorted in a way that made her cries that much more frightening.
this woman was filthy all over and she wasbleeding from what i could only describe as her groin/genital region. my first reaction was shock but after a fewseconds i cleared my head and ran into my tent to grab my knife. i then walked over to the lady who was stillcrying hysterically and asked her what happened. as i got close to her she reached out to meas if to give me an embrace. i hesitantly gave her one of my hands to holdon to and then walked her over to my tent. she didn't say a word, she just kept cryingand leaning herself on me. when we got to my tent i handed her some papertowels and some extra clothes i had.
i then asked her again what happened and ifi could help her clean up or help her in any way that i could. she ignored the towels and clothes and justlet them fall on the floor. she then asked in a smoky/exhausted voicelow voice if she could lay down in my bed. i thought she was a rape victim for sure andtold her yes definitely. she then laid down on top of my sleeping bagand just kept crying and shaking. i decided to just let her be for a while andstarted packing up my stuff, as i figured i would have to run back to get help for thiswoman as there was no cell phone reception there.
after about 25 minutes i collected all ofmy belonging and walked back over to the tent to see if the woman had calmed down. i unzipped the tent and looked inside. the woman was just lying there no longer cryingbut just staring at nothing. i again asked her what had happened but shedidn't answer. i then began to tell her that i was goingto go run and get help and that she could come with me or just stay her until help arrived. again she said nothing. i then told her that i was going to run tothe rangers station and that i would be back
as soon as possible. i left her some water and some food and startedwalking back towards the trail. as i got to the trail i heard a man’s voiceyelling from across the pond from our point. i turned to where i heard the yelling andi saw a man about 200 meters away, also naked with a long beard and lots of body hair. i could not understand what he was sayingat first but as he got closer i could understand the words "i am no good, i am no good" ina low almost unintelligible groan. i was so freaked out at this point that iwas frozen in fear. i was thinking about my options when i noticedthe woman getting out my tent and start walking
towards the man with arms wide open. he then began running towards her and shetowards him. when they reached each other they then embraced. at this point i was in total confusion andshock about what was happening. i just stood there and watched whatever itwas i was watching happen. after what seemed like 30 minutes they letgo of each other and i could see them talking. the woman pointed towards me and then pointedtowards her stomach. the then talked for a little while longerand then both of them started walking over towards me.
i again just stood there trying to figureout what was going on. as they got within 50 meters of me the womanand man both yelled at me almost simultaneously "you can help us". i, still confused, yelled back at them, "helpyou with what" and "what happened". the man and woman did not reply but only puttheir arms in a baby swaddling position in the universal signal for baby. i yelled back at them "what baby" in a concernedvoice. the man then said “i am no good, we needyou for baby". i then said “i don't understand", and startedto take a few steps back.
at this point the woman grabbed two largerocks from the ground and handed one to the man. they then began running towards me. i was terrified and dropped by backpack onthe ground and started sprinting as fast as i could down the trail. i could hear them screaming at me "we needyour help with baby" over and over again at me and could hear them scrambling down thetrail behind me. they had no shoes and the trail was very rockyso i knew if i just kept running they could not keep up for very long.
after about 15 minutes i slowly heard theircries die down to the point where i could no longer hear them. it took me 6 hours to get back to the rangerstation with me running and then taking a break when i needed to. when i got to the ranger station i threw openthe door and began explaining what just happened to the ranger. he knew i was serious from the emotion thati conveyed and told me that he was going to get some backup to go out there and checkout the situation and to retrieve by belongings for me.
he advised me to just sit tight in the rangerstation and that they would be riding their atv's out there within the hour. i told him that i would rather just go homeand that if he could just call me after they investigated the situation. he said ok. i drove the two hours home told my familywhat had happened and waited with them for the phone call. i ended up falling asleep on my parent’sbed like a child and slept through the night. the next morning my father woke me up andtold me that he had just gotten off the phone
with the rangers and that they had taken anaked man and woman into custody. they told my father that the two people wouldnot identify themselves and that they found them on the trail walking back in the directionof the pond. the man and woman were taken to a psychiatrichospital and were both identified as schizophrenic individuals. nothing else was known about them. they couldn't figure out who they were orhow they had gotten to that location. that is all they could tell us. as far as my equipment i told them that ididn't want it anymore as much of it i'm sure
was caked in blood and who knows what else. we found out a few months later that the couplehad set up a campsite hidden near the edge of the pond area and that the rangers hadfound one grave there of a very small miscarried fetus. the man and woman were identified as a marriedcouple who had gone off their medication and decided to move out to the woods to live awayfrom society. they from what everyone guessed had triedto start a family our there but due to malnutrition the woman had a miscarriage. i guess the man had blamed himself for "beingno good" and wanted me to take his place in
impregnating his wife. hello, my name is blue, strange name for astrange woman i suppose. i am currently 23 now, living in the u.s.again, after moving between russia and america. to start this story i must ask that considerationof my age, previous abuse and actions leading up to the result be judged open mindedly. i was around 10 when this nightmare began. most of the time when people hear the namenorth carolina, they think of old country roads, sweet tea and small towns. however, in all the places i've traveled andlived on the east coast, nc has been one of
the more unpleasant places i've had the unfortunateluck to live in. allow me to set the stage: it was november2002, i was a small unimpressive child, wire thin reddish brown hair, skinny with big brownbambi eyes and a sucken in face that made me appear melancholy. dispite looking odd, men seemed to always......hovernear me. like i brought out the inner pedo bear withinthem. i won't go into details, but let us just say,i've had a few surgeries reguarding my female organs and am now unfortunantly barren andi'm sure you can gather why. we lived in a run down house in a run downstreet in the middle of a small town ghetto.
my mum was oblivious to the things i'd beensubjected to. so because of these factors i was a disfunctionalchild with an extensive imagination. i would prefer to play by myself, but if therewas a chance i could have a friend in this lonely cold world, id jump for it. even when they were more bully than friend. i was and currently still am, a black sheep. making friends has always been very hard,and most of my life i have been subjected to cruelty and bullying. beside our house was our neighbors who owned40 cats that all looked malnurished and dirty.
to no surprise these people were busted formeth labs that would impress a german chemist almost every month, how they managed to nevergo to prison is anyone's guess. dispite being gross and smelly, they werealways kind to me. this will play a part later on. so there i was, coloring chalk on the roadwhen a boy slightly older than myself finds his way to my chalk box. his name was manual, but everyone called himalex. he was a rough looking mexican kid, the typethat had a mouth full of teeth that hadn't decided which way they wanted to pertrude.
he was that awkward fat skinny you see inkids all the time, with dark black hair and mean eyes. alex was lonely like myself since we livedon a dead end street with mostly older people and mean teens. ill say now that he was most likely a productof his environment since he had an abusive step father. his mother married a big obese white man whoenjoyed making you feel two inches tall. he would constantly beat up alex, his motherand his mentally ill seven year old sister, who was in fact his child.
his name was mark, and he made everyone aroundhim uncomfortable with his dishovled greasy apearance, baggy disgusting clothes and shoulderlength wire straight hair. he was really tall, at least to me, beingsuch a scrawny kid. what made me uncomfortable around mark wasthe fact his fat belly would always stick out of the bottom of his baggy stained t-shirtsand he would often look at me when touching unattractive places. he always had something mean or creepy tosay. since by then i had been sexually assaulted,i was already wary of men. so i kept my distance.
and for good reason. alex would go back and forth between bullyingme and being my friend and at the time i was so desperate for a companion i accepted beinga mentally abused human yo yo. at one point in our "friendship " he endedup pushing me off my bike, leaving me laying on the road with a sliced open shoulder exposingthe top of the bone as he road my bike back up to his house. since my family consisted of only me, my motherand my two year old sister, confrontations were avoided. so anything stolen from me, just stayed stolen.
fortunately one lot up from our meth neighborswas a fenced in garden one acre long, and then my babooshka's house. that means grandmother in russian. she was a fierce but sweet woman, many woulddescribe her as a mama bear, dangerously protecting her brood. she was very religious, and like most oldwomen, a big gossip. she would often be the one demanding my thingsback from anyone who dared steal them. i am convinced she was a spy in her youngeryears because this woman could find intel. oddly enough, the week leading up to the murdersof alex and his family was that of a calm
one. or so everyone thought. living in the area we were in, it was a usualoccurrence to here loud unsettling things. train tracks adjacent to the start of thestreet had all manner of commotion blasting by at all hours of the day. gun shots would be heard regularly becausethere was a small wooded area at the dead end of the street followed by a creek leadingto an abandoned furniture factory across from us. it seemed like a regular day, it was slightlywarm but otherwise a little chilly.
my birthday was in a couple weeks, and lookingback, after what i discovered, i can't remember it. it was a normal thing for me to venture aroundthe houses of our street in search of cool trinkets and stones. it was odd though, for a few days alex andhis sister kristen who would usually be out and about were no where to be seen. he would sometimes have to babysit her whiletheir parents did....whatever. i had'nt seen them at all. going to their house at the start of the streetwas a small walk, but i was use to it.
my grandmother and mother always scolded mefor going that far, but i was curious why my quote "friend" was absent. what i discovered changed everything. it was probably around 2 p.m. when i got thenerve up to go. as i walked i felt a feeling of dread comeover me. ever since i was a kid i've had a sixth senseabout people and places. its hard to explain. however when the house came into view, itseemed darker than ever. i stood on the street looking at the porchfor some time, fighting the urge to just run
back home. curiosity unfortunantly got the best of me. as i slowly crept up the wooden stairs i smeltsomething so grotesque it made my eyes burn. like a pungent stink you can taste in yourmouth. i slowly knocked. no answer. i knock a few more times, but nothing stirred. which was weird because the family car wasin the drive way and they also had this awful yappy dog that would nip and bark at the smallestof things.
i want to say that i'm not the type of personto just barge into someone's home, but i had an awful feeling. like your stomach turning upside down andyou get queesy. so, gathering my nerves and holding my breathe,i opened the unlocked door. it was slightly dim inside, but a wave ofputrid decay smacked me in the face, and the first thing my little eyes see after adjusting.....isblood all over the place. my eyes darted and i saw someone laying onthe ground and on the couch was mark, sitting up with his head half way gone; a shotgunlaying against his chest. a lurch in my chest caused me to spasm backwardsand i fall straight on my ass, desperately
trying to scrabble to my feet. there was no doubt in my childish mind, thiswas real. i bolted behind their car, in total shockand terror. i was trembling and i had it in my mind thatwhoever did this had seen me and i was next. as a child, suicide never occurred to me,but to be fair everything happened so fast and i was so scatter brained, that i was instinctuallyterrified. i ran behind the houses and backyards, makingmy way to the small wooded area near the creek. if anything i figured i would be safe there,and it was the closest. every sound was the murderer.
every little shadow in the corner of my eyes,a threat. i'd never ran so fast in my life. after hiding by the creek for what seemedforever, i decided to make a dash to my home. but my mum wasn't there. she was probably right up the street at mygrandmother's doing what families do best, eating and bickering. i climbed through the window, ripping my kneesup in my panic. since bad things had happened to me in thepast, i had made a safe place where no one could find me.
a small cubby hole leading inside the wallsfrom a hole in my closet. i was just small enough to wedge myself inwith a flashlight. and that's where i stayed. a couple hours later, my mother bursts throughthe door calling my name franticly, but i don't budge. i can hear her searching the house for me,starting to cry. that's when i finally came out. i ran to her and just cried. i was covered in filth and my knees were shredded.
i must have looked awful. she couldn't get me to tell her why though,because out of fear i thought i'd get in trouble for being at the start of the street and thatwas not allowed. at the time she didn't tell me why she wassearching for me, but i soon found out. at the beginnning of our street were ambulances,police cars and all manner of news vans. apparently our next door neighbors, the methaddicts had seen the door slightly open at the tetters. apparently, to everyone's surprise, they wererelated to mark. that's when they investigated for themselvesand came upon the bodies of kristen, the mentally
handicap daughter of mark, laying on the floorin her own blood. in the news they said that mark had been angryabout his wife elizabeth getting a divorce, but they agreed to still live together forthe kids. he ended up supposedly taking some drugs andwent insane with anger and smothered her and alex in their beds. he then brought kristen to the living room,where i had glimpsed them first, and shot her in the head with a shotgun, then killingtheir yappy dog, and finally sitting down and eating a bullet. it was awful.
i was so scared i was going to get in troublethat i completely stopped talking for a month. i wouldn't open up to counselors or therapists. i wouldn't say a word. no one ever came asking questions however. i guess the police had their answers whenthey saw mark. the murder suicide stuck to the name of ourstreet for years after that. no one would dare go down to bristol st. it was a place of murderers and gangstersand death. however it was the complete opposite.
it was just a normal run down street in arun down town that unfortunantly witnessed the slaying of a family by the hands of theirsupposed protector. what do you even say to that when someoneasks? i haven't found the right words yet honestly. but in my opinion, i think mark did it ofhis own accord. he had always hated alex, and his only offspringwas a special needs individual of whom he was ashamed of. i think he killed them because he honestlydidn't love any of them. in the time i had gotten to know the tetters,i never once saw him be affectionate towards
them. you don't kill the ones you love like that. for years after that i was plagued with nightterrors and fear. how does one put that kind of scene out oftheir mind? many people claim ptsd isnt a real thing,but id like to invite them to witness brutal death like that and see how they fare. i slowly returned to my normal self. or, as normal as a kid in my situation couldtry to be. i've never told anyone that i was the firstone to happen upon the bodies of the tetters
family. not until now. for years i was ashamed that i had never toldsomeone, or called the police. but, i was a kid scared out of my mind. even today, i still don't know what i'd dotoday as an adult if i came across it again. i like to think of myself as a strong fearlesswoman at times, but in all honesty. ...i feel like that small scared little girlin a big cruel world a lot. i don't know if i am a product of my enviroment,but what i do know is who i am and what legacy i'd like to leave behind.
i guess if anything it made me stronger, buthonestly i just feel numb to tragedy now. all we can hope for is that they are at peace,and that mark, that big sack of shit, is in some kind of hell for his unnatural actionsagainst his family. i think the most upsetting part of all thisthough, is alex had an older brother that was away at university. i can only imagine what he still carries withhim today. i know i still carry a small bit of it. in 2007 i went on a date with a guy from craigslist.
i was 17 years old at the time. i put an ad up looking to meet someone, idon't remember the details. a guy responded who lived close to me, andso i emailed him back and gave him my number. he was actually one of the only ones who respondedwithout a creepy message. he said his name was jon and he was 26 yearsold. this guy, jon, and i, spoke for two days beforemeeting, and we met on a friday night. we texted back and forth and he asked if iwas single, i said yes. he asked what kind of food i liked to eat,because he wanted to take me to a restaurant. i asked him a few questions about himself,he told me he still lived with his mother
but had the top floor to himself, and thathe was a part time model that made good money. judging by his picture him being a model wasfairly believable. so on friday night jon comes to pick me up. he drove a silver two door car, i want tosay ford. he popped me a message to say he was waitingoutside, and after checking my hair and make up one last time i said goodbye to my parents,telling them i was heading out with friends, and left. i got into jon's car and the first thing inoticed was that he looked exactly like his photo – the tall dark and handsome type.
he had pale skin with dark hair and dark eyes. he looked a little older in person but hemade up for it with a snappy fashion sense. he looked cool, and cute. he was incredibly kind, and his body languageand smile totally put me at ease. yes, it's really stupid to go on a date fromcraigslist, but surprisingly this guy was normal. we chatted for a while as he started drivingaway from my home town, towards the highway. he wanted to drive us into the city to goto dinner, which wasn't too far – around a 25 minute journey.
jon started to reveal more details about himselfto me on this journey – he told me he was embarrassed to tell me he lived with his mother,that i might think bad of him for not having his own place at his age. jon got closer and closer to the highway andi can't tell you what it was, i won't make it up because i don't remember, but it wasn'tanything remotely creepy, i just felt put off by him. you know where you're on a date with someoneand you're not sure and then they tell you something that's you're biggest turn off? it was that kind of situation.
again, he didn't say anything too creepy,just... off putting. as we're getting closer and closer to theturn off i tell this perfectly nice guy “i'm really sorry, i don't feel like going to dinnerany more, i'm not feeling wellâ€. jons initial reaction was sympathy. “what's wrong?†“are you ok?†“is it my driving?!†i told him i just didn't feel well. jon then kept asking me “what did i say?
what did i do?!†i told him it's not him, it's me, i wantedto go home because i felt ill. then he said “ok, let me just drive aroundfor a little bit before i take you back, i don't want to end the evening like this.†i knew that without him driving me home i'dhave to walk over an hour, maybe more, so i told him that driving for a bit soundedlike a fine idea. but, instead of him turning around and goingback towards mine, he veered off and started heading to the town i knew he lived in. i should mention it was pitch black out andthe town where jon lived was surrounded by
dense wood. this isn't even worth mentioning if you takethe highway and proper turn offs to get there, but he decided he wanted to go via the backroads because it's more “scenicâ€, despite the fact i couldn't see a thing. jon had gone from being incredibly talkativeto almost completely silent. he kept driving further into the wooded area. a few times i'd ask him questions about himselfto break the awkward silence. at one point i put my hand on his knee, affectionately,trying to regain the friendly, flirty banter we'd had earlier.
he blanked me for the most part, occasionallyanswering in soft grunts or nods. it was like he was having a tantrum. jon pulled into the parking lot for the forest. it was around 9pm so naturally it was totallyempty. he slowly kept driving, looking around forother cars and then parked himself up right at the end, close to the woods. there was nobody else in the parking lot andi hadn't even seen us pass other cars to get for 10 minutes he just sat there, staringinto the darkness ahead. which was... disturbing.
i think i managed to make small talk for maybe5 minutes, which is a long time when someone isn't talking back. then i joined him in his silence. i was afraid of appearing fake, i didn't wanthim to think i was scared. so some time of silence goes past and abruptlyjon gets out of the car, closes the door and locks the car. i was stuck inside. his lights were on so i could sort of seeahead. in front of the car was a field that maybewent on for about 20 feet (so really a patch
of grass) and then beyond that were treesand dense forest. to the left was the rest of the car park andexit at the far end and to the immediate right was more forest with a small path. jon disappeared into the forest ahead. i tried the handle on the door. wouldn't open. i began to rationalize this. maybe he accidentally locked the door? i was telling myself if he really wanted todo something he'd have stayed in the car.
with no sight of jon i decided i needed tocall someone. i looked around for my phone and i couldn'tfind it. this was an old, silver pay-as-you-go flipphone. i was confused that i couldn't find it becausei had put it right next to me in the cup holder. after looking for it for a good few minutesi became sure he had taken it. mind you, i didn't want to start rooting aroundhis car, knowing he might be watching me. i didn't want him to catch on i was freakingout. at that point i started looking for my phonewith only my eyes, instead of making it obvious. i was petrified this guy was watching me panicin the darkness.
my eyes were darting all around the floor. nothing. i looked up and squinted into the field andforest ahead. i saw him. jon was standing about 10 feet from the car,on that small field. he was standing, and smiling. it wasn't a friendly smile. he looked freaky. this was not the same guy i got in the carwith.
i looked ahead and smiled back. i was still trying to act like his behaviorwas normal. like nothing he was doing was scary. still smiling, his tongue began to protrudefrom his mouth, he stuck it out all the way. he began wagging his tongue up and down whilemaintaining eye contact with me. i felt myself trembling. i was trying to compose myself. not taking his eyes off of of me, and withhis tongue still out, he started unzipping his pants.
he took out his dick and proceeded to urinatein front of me while staring the whole time. this is the point i found it difficult toact like i was “in†on his behavior. i looked down at the floor, not wanting towatch what was in front of me. he didn't creep or slink back to the car,instead i hear his thundering steps and then a slam against the window. i guess at this point i was the luckiest personalive because another car pulled into the parking lot. i don't know what this did to jon, but immediatelyhe got back into the car and laughed at me, that normal laugh, and said “so what musicdo you like?
i'll put it on while i drive you home!†and he did. he drove me all the way home. when we pulled up to my house i went for thedoor but it was still locked. “i want you to promise me something...†i asked him what that was. “if you see me, if you ever see me afterthis, turn the other way. act like you don't know me. if you see me with my family don't you daresay a word.
i don't expect to bump into you but don'tsay anything.†i agreed. i then asked him “have you seen my phone?†he told me no. i guess my phone was a small sacrifice forsurprisingly making it home ok. when i got in i said goodnight to my parentsand went upstairs to my room, and turned on my computer. i wanted to gather as much information aboutthe guy as i could. back then i used msn messenger (like aim).
it logged in automatically whenever i startedup my pc. now before i get to the final part of thisstory, it's important you know this. one day before i had been at my best friend'shouse. we had the kind of friendship where it waslike... who could pick on the other the most. it was all good fun and we mostly just rippedthe shit out of each other and had a laugh. the day before she had changed two contactsin my phone (an old 'prank') replaced the contact “mom†with a guy i had been sendingsexual texts back and forth with. i immediately knew she had done this becausei saw the previous messages come up, but i didn't change the numbers back at the time,thinking i'd do it later.
so when i logged on to msn i had a tonne ofmessages from this guy, and a few from my best friend. when jon had locked me in the car he had takenmy phone and texted “mom†telling her that “i'm sorry but i decided to move out,i've met someone. please don't look for me, i am happy beingleft aloneâ€. so another thing about that message was itwas all written in text speak (swap “please†for “plz†for example) and this guy knewi never texted like that. aside from the message itself, this was abig red flag. he had texted me back (he showed me on cam)“?†before texting again saying “i don't
think this is you, know where you went, callingthe policeâ€. this was incredibly quick thinking as he hadabsolutely no idea where i was. i think that text saved my life that night,and it explains jon's sudden change of behavior. if it wasn't the random car, it was the text. afterwards:we tried to find this guy online by name, and by email, couldn't find anything. it seemed everything on him was fake. my best friend pressed me to call the policebut i never did because i feared the retribution i'd get from my parents for going on a datewith a guy i didn't know.
my friend ended up betraying my trust (i know,she's the smart one) and telling my mom any way, who still didn't call the police butinstead did what i expected and banned me from my pc and going out, while also callingme an idiot. there is something else too... turns out this guy's first name was jon, andhe did in fact live in the town he said he did. around three years later i started going outwith a guy from that very town called chris. we were talking about exes one day and i toldhim about my creepy encounter. i didn't even get half way through the storybefore he stopped me and started asking questions
about what jon looked like, how old he looked,how old he said he was etc. turns out he knew him. this guy was now in prison for attacking andraping a 14 year old girl and beating her bloody in a nearby park (she survived withoutlong term injury). that was just what he was in prison for though. my friend told me he was well known for beinga creep waaaayyyyy before that and his friends even called him “creepy jonâ€. he would go around the nearby parks wherehe knew the younger girls hung out and he would ask them to get in his car or take theirphoto.
he would always tell them he was a model,too. my boyfriend at the time first met him whenhe was 12 because jon decided to take up skateboarding and tried to make friends with lots of theyoung boys in the skate park. he couldn't believe i'd actually got in acar with him. if anyone is wondering, yes the guy is stillin prison today.
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